I'm still pregnant.
This week was tougher than I expected it to be. Physically things are difficult, and only continue to get more difficult, but beyond that, emotionally I been a bit of a mess.
People, understandably, keeps asking if Sprout has arrived yet. We've said we will keep everyone updated, but there are still calls and emails daily. While I appreciate that we're in peoples' thoughts, it's also a constant reminder that we are still waiting.
I'm not able to get around easily, so I've mostly been at home, wondering when/if I am going to go into labour. I try to distract myself. The reminders don't make that any easier.
Last night she didn't seem to be moving around as much as usual. I said something to Jen about it and she asked if things were okay. That got me worrying that they weren't. I ended up sitting up in bed, in tears, hands on my belly waiting for some of the big kicks that she usually gives me in the evenings. Eventually she did, but I was a mess waiting for them. Thoughts of a long-time family friend who's son was stillborn at full term kept running through my head. I wondered if I should be calling the midwife or going to the hospital or having an ultrasound just to make sure things were okay. I worry that she would be better off outside than in, at this point. I worry about the cord wrapping around her neck. I worry that she'll grow to large for me to have a vaginal birth.
I talked to my midwife and she agreed to an induction on the 27th. I don't really want to be induced, but they would do it by the 30th anyway. And I feel ready to meet this little one now. I am confident that she is grown and developed and that those three extra days would not make a difference to that. I also don't feel like those three days would make the difference of NOT needing the induction. Plus, Jen's parents were going to stay until the 26th and then come back for the 30th. That seemed silly. With the induction scheduled for the 27th they'll just stay here until after the birth. I feel better not worrying about them travelling 6+ hours to and fro on winter roads.
Accupuncture this week was slightly more painful that in has been. I probably won't make any more appointments. The 24th and 26th would be the two days my accupuncturist is available and I already have a midwife appointment on the 24th. I feel like if the accupuncture were going to make the baby come, it would have happened by now, though I do still hope it's helped my body prepare. My midwife suggested inserting the Evening Primrose Oil and perhaps trying Castor Oil, but I think I'll just be to disappointed to have put myself through the discomfort if it turns out that those methods don't help. So basically I've decided to just wait. I'll keep taking my EPO and homeopathics, I'll try to walk when/if I feel up to it, but I'm not going to start anything else.
Please continue to send all your baby-come-soon thoughts out to the universe on our behalf.
One way or another she will be here with us by next week.
And we'll keep you updated. Promise.
41 week belly:
