Restless

I know it's not just me who's feeling the relentlessness of this winter.  Generally speaking I like winter, but this year it seems like it's never going to end.  Sprout is just getting stable on her feet, and while I'd love to take her out and let her walk around our quiet neighbourhood streets, or find a park with a nice path, there's too much snow and ice and slush for that to be a possibility.  She also seems to have inherited my sensitive skin, so if there's even the slightest bit of wind or a chill in the air her cheeks are bright red and chapped within minutes.  I feel like The Bean has been feeling cooped up too.  He's been spending a lot of time indoors both at daycare and at home, which is not easy for him.  He likes to move far too much to be content in closed areas.  But again, the weather isn't making it easy to get him outside.  This weekend we did driveway bike riding in snowpants.

Spring cannot come soon enough.

I'm also feeling the busy monotony of being a SAHM.  There's always plenty to do, but it's not the most engaging.  I love, love, love spending time with kids, but really the only thing I do love about it.  I'm ready to be working again, but job postings seem few and far between with a lot of competition for the few positions that do come up.  I've started subbing at one school, but they don't call often.  In fact, it's been nearly a month since I was in.  I've tried to get on other school's sub lists, but they must be set for the year, as most of my calls have not even been returned.  I miss the classroom.  I miss teaching.  And I really, really miss the kids.  I feel the emptiness of not having these things as a part of my life more than I expected to, and I expected to, so that's saying something.

I feel like I do a lot of complaining, and I really hate that.  (I know, complaining about complaining, please humour me.)  I love so many things about my life and am bursting with gratitude for them.  Especially the three main ones.  I mean, how I ever got so fortunate to have these people in my life, I just don't know.  They're amazing.

Maybe I should just bundle that baby up and go outside when she gets up from her nap.  Chapped cheeks are not so horrible, right?