I don't think either of us really expected Someone Else to come along. But when that happened it was heart-wrenching for both of us. We couldn't continue as "us" with Someone Else in the picture so we decided to "just be friends." We both started dating. However, neither of us had really lost the feelings we had for each other.
It was somewhere around a year after we had first crossed paths, while Jen and I were in our "just friends" stage, that I came home exhausted from a late class at school and couldn't get into the house. I thought there was something wrong with my keys and kept trying the lock. My focus went from the keys in my hands to the porch around me. There was a suitcase on the porch. And broken glass from a vase of flowers Jen had sent me when I had been feeling down the week before. And photos of us torn into pieces littered all over the ground.
My mom had found some photos of Jen and I sitting on a hotel bed together and decided that it was more than she could take. She had the locks changed. She kicked me out.
In a state of shock I went to a neighbour's house and called my dad. In tears, I asked him if I could stay with him for a while. Thankfully he didn't ask many questions, and just came to get me.
The next few months are a bit of a blur. I fumbled my way through the school and work. I continued to date the guy I'd been seeing. Jen continued to date the girl she'd been seeing. I had already been heartbroken, but now I was shattered. The only reason I was able to hold myself together is because I didn't have any other choice.
Jen and I continued to talk. Through everything that had been happened, our feelings towards each other had remained. Eventually we made the decision to get back together. It still wasn't easy, but it was easier. Ironically I had been "outed" while dating a guy. Of course, there was more "outing" to do after we got back together. However this time I was less anxious. I didn't have as much to lose.
What an awful experience. I'm enjoying reading your story, but that part clearly sucked.
ReplyDeleteYup. It surely did.
DeleteOh wow. I can't wait to hear more. So your mom's initial reaction was awful--has she since come around to support you both??
ReplyDeleteShe's come around a good bit.
DeleteOh wow. I am so sorry to hear about your mom's reaction. What an awful experience. I hope things are better now.
ReplyDeleteThey are.
DeleteWhat an awful thing to do. I hope that I never understand how a parent could do that. I futher hope that she has apologized since. A lot.
ReplyDelete(By the way, yours is one of the blogs I can't comment on from the ipad. Sorry I have been unable to say anything! I am reading away, all the same.)
LOL. The other day she actually said she "Wouldn't change the way things had happened." I know she just meant that she was glad things have worked out so well, but it still stung.
DeleteThis IS a dramatic story! It is nice reading it and knowing it ends well, at least with Jen. I hope that your mom has come around. I had a pretty traumatic coming out with my parents too (not as traumatic as yours, though) and while I'm not sure my relationship with them ever will or can truly heal it is much better since Juju was born. I hope the same is true for you or that you have made peace with the relationship you have with your family.
ReplyDelete"I'm not sure my relationship with them ever will or can truly heal..."
DeleteYes. This. It has gotten better and peace has been made though and it is what it is.
So sorry about your Mum's reaction :(
ReplyDeleteThank you.
DeleteOh, now I'm crying, over a glass of wine, alone in my living room. I desperately want to hug that twenty-one-year-old you. To tell you what a proud, beautiful, strong, in love, loving woman she'll become. And that she'll be the most amazing mama!
ReplyDeleteYou're sweet. Twenty-one-year-old me would have appreciated the hug. Thirty-two-year-old me appreciates the sentiment.
DeleteI was so stunned to read that! It breaks my heart as a parent. I'm so sorry you had to go through that.
ReplyDeleteThanks Katy.
DeletePerhaps it shouldn't have, but it stunned me too.
I can't imagine, as a parent, ever feeling the necessity to do that to one of my children. But we all handle things differently, I suppose.